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Tuesday, 31 August, 2010

A Video Compilation I’d Like To See

I apologize to everyone who hates the "24" TV show. Sure it's stupid, but it's perfect treadmill accompaniment, and I've been watching a lot of it lately.

What I'd like to see is a video compilation that shows every instance of Jack Bauer punctuating a command with now!  As in, Drop your weapon. Now!

My best estimate is that he says this 6 times per episode, on average. 24 episodes in a season equals 144 times per season. Seven seasons of "24" means 1,008 sentences punctuated by now!

Let's say that each clip lasts an average of 2 seconds. That works out to a 33-minute film. Add commercials, and it would easily fill a 2-hour time slot on TV.

There's a video compilation of Jack saying Damn it!, but it's not comprehensive. And there's also a compilation of Tony Almeida saying All Right? But noNow!

So who wants to invest a few weeks of their life and make that video?

Permalink | Posted in Movies & TV @7:14pm | Comments (11)

Orly Update

A post from Orly's blog:

"They" can only mean the Obama administration.

Permalink | Posted in General @6:04pm | Comments (11)

Remembering Names

Advice we all can use: How to Remember People's Names.

Here is how a typical scenario plays out:

  1. The other person says to you: "Hi, I'm Sasha"
  2. You respond by presenting your own name: "Nice to meet you, Sasha. I'm Philip"
  3. A split-second later, you totally forget Sasha's name because your mind is too pre-occupied thinking about the next thing you're going to say to carry the conversation forward, or too focused on listening to Sasha talk. Likewise, Sasha also totally forgets your name.
  4. The conversation might proceed for a few minutes, and then by the time you and Sasha part ways, neither of you can remember the other's name, but you're both too embarrassed to ask for it again. Game over.

I've found that this same scenario holds true even if your name is not Sasha or Philip. Maybe we should just call all females Sasha, and all males Philip. That would solve that problem.

Permalink | Posted in General @5:38pm | Comments (17)

How Did That Happen?

Found at LP Cover Lover.

A one-legged woman was up on a ladder decorating the Christmas tree, when the weight of her beehive hairdo made her lose her balance. Fortunately, she fell on a soft bear skin rug. A few minutes later, her husband found her and revived her with a cup of instant coffee.

That's he only possible explanation for that photo.

Permalink | Posted in General @5:04pm | Comments (9)

A Day In The Life

Of Obama: Washington, We Have a Problem.

How broken is Washington? Beyond repair? A day in the life of the president reveals that Barack Obama's job would be almost unrecognizable to most of his predecessors-thanks to the enormous bureaucracy, congressional paralysis, systemic corruption (with lobbyists spending $3.5 billion last year), and disintegrating media. Inside the West Wing, the author talks to Obama's top advisers about the challenge of playing the Washington game, ugly as it has become, even while their boss insists they find a way to transcend it.

I haven't read it yet, but I will.

(via waxy.org)

Permalink | Posted in General @4:59pm | Comments (3)

Toilet Tube Art

By Anastassia Elias: Rouleaux.

Here's one of 12:

Permalink | Posted in Visual Arts @4:56pm | Comments (4)

The Individual

You know what's a weird word? Individual. As in:

"None of the witnesses could recall a name tag, badge number or whether the individual had a gun belt. Typically, uniformed NYPD officers are in pairs. This individual was alone," Browne said.

Why not just use the word person?

I just googled the word and found this:

Since the 19th century, however, there have been numerous objections to the use of the word to refer simply to "person" where no larger contrast is implied, as in Two individuals were placed under arrest or The Mayor will make time for any individual who wants to talk to her.

This use of individual is common in official statements, as the examples imply, and lends a formal or even pretentious tone that may be undesirable. The words person and people are acceptable, neutral options that are appropriate in almost any context.

So I'm not alone in thinking that word is strange.

Permalink | Posted in General @9:10am | Comments (19)

Prison TV For Sale


This is a prison TV. These were made specifically for in-cell prison entertainment; they were made transparent to prevent inmates from being able to use them to store contraband, and smuggle illegal items.

Permalink | Posted in General @7:12am | Comments (8)

Penguin Conference

Right now in Boston, penguins are gathering for the 7th International Penguin Conference.

The International Penguin Conference (IPC) is the primary gathering focusing on penguin biology, ecology, health, and behavior. It is an opportunity for the world's leading scientists, research managers, and policy makers to discuss ongoing research, identify current and emerging conservation issues, and create action plans.

Formal attire required.

(Thanks wormpicker)

Permalink | Posted in General @7:10am | Comments (8)

Revenge Products

Shomer-Tec sells law enforcement and military equipment. They also have a complete line of Revenge Products.

For example, here's a bottle of Nasty Yellow Teeth ($9.00):

Just pour this into a drink container (soda, coffee, etc.). Once your target finishes his drink, his mouth, teeth and tongue will have turned a most vomit-retching puke-yellow color! And he won't even know it, at least until he sees the horrified looks on other's faces as they try to keep from tossing their own cookies. "A drink before your speech, Mayor?"

Permalink | Posted in Products @7:06am | Comments (2)

Avoiding Traffic Jams

Curtis sent me a simple cure for MERGING-LANE TRAFFIC JAMS.

Traffic jams on highways are often triggered where two lanes must merge into one. Lanes of cars cannot merge if there are no large gaps between cars. Therefore, drivers who create large gaps between cars will ease this type of traffic jam.

  1. Maintain a large space ahead of your car.
  2. Encourage one, two even three cars to merge ahead of you.
  3. If traffic slows to a complete stop, KEEP TWO CAR-LENGTHS OF SPACE OPEN AHEAD OF YOU.
  4. Never "punish" merging drivers by closing your gap.

Here's an example of smooth traffic because of large gaps:

You cannot eliminate every problem by simply making a big gap in front of your car. When there are too many cars on the road, traffic slows down. But if we use these special driving habits, the smaller jams can be erased, and stop-and-go traffic can be smoothed out. Since many traffic jams are caused by merging lanes, many traffic jams can be improved by the actions of just one drive.

Curtis has been using this technique for years, which explains why there are very few traffic jams in Minnessota.

Permalink | Posted in General @6:59am | Comments (20)

Hair Insurance

Hair so lovely, and not a speck of dandruff: Shampoo Brand Insures NFL Player's Hair For $1 Million.

You've got to love a public relations stunt when it comes with a photo like this. Head & Shoulders has taken out a $1 million insurance policy on Pittsburgh Steelers safety Troy Polamalu's hair. Polamalu is a second year spokesperson for the brand. With Watkins Syndicate at Lloyd's of London, the world's leading insurance agency, Head & Shoulders created the first ever insurance policy to protect the player's hair for the entire NFL season.

Permalink | Posted in Sports @6:54am | Comments (7)

Monday, 30 August, 2010

Glenn Beck Not Dead

I can just imagine the controversy at The Onion when they were deciding whether or not to release this video: Victim in Fatal Car Accident Tragically Not Glenn Beck.

Caution: Non-Christian language.

Permalink | Posted in Humor @7:26pm | Comments (14)

Name This Tune

This is an original composition that needs a name. Please suggest a name for this tune.

It's my first attempt using my laptop's built-in camera. I'm also wearing my new color shifting shirt.

Permalink | Posted in Banjo @4:12pm | Comments (84)

How A Writer Writes

This is an interesting article about a novelist: James Patterson Inc.

Patterson may lack the name recognition of a Stephen King, a John Grisham or a Dan Brown, but he outsells them all. Really, it's not even close. (According to Nielsen BookScan, Grisham's, King's and Brown's combined U.S. sales in recent years still don't match Patterson's.)

This is partly because Patterson is so prolific: with the help of his stable of co-authors, he published nine original hardcover books in 2009 and will publish at least nine more in 2010.

Since 2006, one out of every 17 novels bought in the United States was written by James Patterson. He is listed in the latest edition of "Guinness World Records," published last fall, as the author with the most New York Times best sellers, 45, but that number is already out of date: he now has 51 - 35 of which went to No. 1.

While no one would mistake his novels for literature, they are difficult to put down -- and make great audio books.

Permalink | Posted in Books @3:12pm | Comments (8)

Stickman Reads The Bible

Found at Debunking Christianity.

Permalink | Posted in Humor @3:08pm | Comments (5)

Levitating Apparition

Guess what holiday is coming up? The Levitating Haunting Apparition.

This ghastly ghost lunges toward trick-or-treaters and sways eerily side-to-side when it detects sound. The 5' tall apparition slowly rises 13" and groans and wails in a spooky muffled voice when a noise is made or in response to the programmable timer.

A mechanical frame hidden inside the ghoul elevates and sways the ghost, creating the illusion of a hovering apparition. The ghost's eyes light up with a red ghoulish glow.

Click the link, watch the video, and tell me if it's worth $150. But don't blame me if it scares your socks off.

Permalink | Posted in Products @3:06pm | Comments (5)

People’s Key?

Eric Zorn is taking a poll: What key do you consider to be "The People's Key"?

He omitted the sharp/flat keys. The only choices are A, B, C, D E, F, or G. He sez:

I'll explain why I'm asking later on in the comment thread.

That should be interesting.

Permalink | Posted in Music @2:30pm | Comments (17)

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