Simplify Your Life

Excellent advice: 43 simple ways to simplify your life.

A few examples:

• Sit on a big, thick book
• Mail a surprise toaster
• Amputate favorite limb
• Freeze your clutter
• More crying but quieter
• Resimplify your simplicity

I'm going to try that toaster-related one.

Chevron Vs. Ecuador

Interesting case: Chevron hires twelve public relations firms to discredit indigenous Indians in Ecuador.

In response to an environmental lawsuit filed against the oil giant, Chevron has fortified its defenses with at least twelve different public relations firms whose purpose is to debunk the claims made against the company by indigenous people living in the Amazon forests of Ecuador. According to them, Chevron dumped billions of gallons of toxic waste in the Amazon between 1964 and 1990, causing damages assessed at more than $27 billion.

The company is being criticized by people and organizations from across the social and political spectrum for its unethical behavior in regards to the case. Originally filed in U.S. federal district court back in 1993, the lawsuit was eventually moved to courts in Ecuador at Chevron's behest. Having initially lauded Ecuador's legal system in an effort to have the case moved there, Chevron later changed its mind and began attacking the system when that system found the company liable for damages.

Shareholders are also upset with Chevron for its gross mismanagement of the case in which it has sidestepped the rule of law and employed guerilla-style tactics in a last ditch effort to fend off an unfavorable ruling.

Corpsman

I've been reading references to "corpseman" in the comments, and I didn't understand it. So I googled it. Obama Calls Navy Corpsman 'Corpse Man'.

The media, including the blogosphere, talk radio, and cable news is all abuzz over President Barack Obama's mispronunciation of the word "corpsman" in praising American military personnel at the National Prayer Breakfast.

President Obama pronounced "corpsman" as "corpse man" twice in the same address. This mispronunciation has caused quite a bit of ridicule about a man who ascended to the presidency based upon his rhetorical skills.

Good thing I'm not president. I would have pronounced it the same way. It's not a word that I've ever spoken before. I don't think I've even heard it spoken.

Punch Scheduled For Thursday

Ayatollah Ali Khamenei sez: Iran anniversary 'punch' will stun West.

Supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei said on Monday that Iran is set to deliver a "punch" that will stun world powers during this week's 31st anniversary of the Islamic revolution.

"The Iranian nation, with its unity and God's grace, will punch the arrogance (Western powers) on the 22nd of Bahman (February 11) in a way that will leave them stunned," Khamenei, who is also Iran's commander-in-chief, told a gathering of air force personnel.

The country's top cleric was marking the occasion when Iran's air force gave its support to revolutionary leader Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini, a key event which led to the toppling of the US-backed shah on February 11, 1979.

No Bighorns

Local news: Mourning the loss of bighorn sheep in the Catalinas.

Bighorn sheep are everywhere in northwest Tucson. The iconic beasts are seen in galleries, on signs, and in public art. The rams show up as subdivision logos and school mascots. The town of Oro Valley's seal features the silhouette of a ram. Small consolation to be honored so by the species that drove them out.

Bighorns are omnipresent save for one place. On top of Pusch Ridge they are conspicuously absent. Outdated trail signs wrongly note their existence on the ridge, posing a question that is emblematic of the changing West. Should the U.S. Forest Service change the signs to reflect the reality that they are gone?

Irony is common here in the West. First we carelessly vanquish the subjugated. Then we celebrate the vanquished by transforming them into kitsch.

Vulgar replicas of our lost treasures appeal to popular taste and proliferate. We festoon our sterile yards with rusted metal likenesses of the native wildlife you're lucky to ever glimpse.

We hawk bigger-than-life bronzes of Native Americans depicted with a romantic awe that was utterly absent when we rolled across their world centuries ago.

We honor the vanquished by turning them into things that serve as sentimental totems for our regret.

Human Dogs

YouTube has a bunch of videos of dogs acting very human. Like this:

Best And Worst Chips

At Taquitos.net:

• Worst Chips Ever. The winner is Sepasang Naga Squid Cracker.

I had a need to test, and as the bag said, "If you think of test, please try squid cracker," so I complied. The initial odor is that of a 3-day-old fish market in a third world, or at least the section of the fish docks where the chum isn't even processed. Once you're over that, the rest of the chip isn't that bad.

It comes looped together in deep-fried curls of 3 or more strands, which can only be assumed to be squid strands. The actual consistency is that of cheap styrofoam. And I mean cheap, as in not the high-quality foam used to protect electronic equipment; it's more the sytrofoam used to protect $2 Christmas ornaments. The actual taste is that of dead fish, not really squid as the bag promises. It's also not the taste of say, dead grilled salmon, more like the dead fish that didn't make it into shore via net, but rather was carried in by the tide. That's about it. It tastes like dead fishy styrofoam.

• Best Chips Ever. The winner is Tim's Cascade Style Hot Jalapeno Seasoned Potato Chips.

These are truly some of the best chips I've ever had. If you can't handle really hot stuff, don't even try them. They're really hot. Really. I mean, eat one or two, and you're all set. Definitely plan on having these with a cold beverage. But heat isn't all they've got going for them. They're also really thick, crisp and crunchy. These are truly good chips.

Property Tax Assessment

Whenever I get a notice about property taxes, it always comes from an individual. For example, I just got a notice telling me of my house's value in 2011, and it came from Bill Staples, Pima County Assessor. When I lived in San Diego, it was the same thing. Property Tax notices always came from some guy (whose name I can't remember).

A quick check on Google tells me that this is pretty much true everywhere. If you go to a tax assessor Web site, you'll almost always see the name (and usually a photo) of the person responsible.

Can anyone explain this? Why doesn't the notice just come from the Office of the Assessor? Why must a person's name be listed? Is there really just one person doing all the work?

The answer is probably common knowledge, but it just seems odd to me.

My Way Killings

In The Philippines: Sinatra song often strikes deadly chord.

The authorities do not know exactly how many people have been killed warbling "My Way" in karaoke bars over the years in the Philippines, or how many fatal fights it has fueled. But the news media have recorded at least half a dozen victims in the past decade and includes them in a subcategory of crime dubbed the "My Way Killings."

The killings have produced urban legends about the song and left Filipinos groping for answers. Are the killings the natural byproduct of the country's culture of violence, drinking and machismo? Or is there something inherently sinister in the song?

Whatever the reason, many karaoke bars have removed the song from their playbooks.

Sing along:

For what is a man what has he got
If not himself then he has not
To say the things he truly feels
And not the words of one who kneels
The record shows I took the blows
And did it my way

America Under Socialism

A comic from 1950, when people were concerned about such things: America Under Socialism.

Chapel For Exorcisms

This should help: Exorcism chapel opened in Mexico.

A Mexican church in the central city of Queretaro has opened a chapel in which exorcisms can take place.

There are no accurate figures for the number of exorcisms in Mexico. But the Roman Catholic Church says that in Mexico City alone there are about 10 cases a month - and the phenomenon is on the rise.

Critics say that priests often mistake mental illness or epilepsy for signs of possession. The new church will only treat people already seen by doctors.

Belief in possession and exorcism is common in a country where more than 90% of the population is Catholic.

Advances In Ketchup Packaging

Several people have sent me links to this story, so it must be important: Dip, dunk or squeeze: Heinz redesigns the ketchup packet.

After 40 years, H.J. Heinz Co. is playing catch-up with the design of the beloved yet frustrating ketchup packet, making it bigger and easier to open.

The company Thursday unveiled the Heinz Dip & Squeeze for restaurants. The cuplike container -- the first major ketchup packet design change in 42 years -- gives users a choice of peeling back a lid for dipping or tearing off a tip to squeeze onto foods. It holds more than three times the amount of a traditional packet.

It certainly looks innovative.

Advances In Child Discipline

That'll teach her: U.S. soldier 'waterboarded his own daughter, 4, because she couldn't recite alphabet'.

A soldier waterboarded his four-year-old daughter because she was unable to recite her alphabet. Joshua Tabor admitted to police he had used the CIA torture technique because he was so angry.

As his daughter 'squirmed' to get away, Tabor said he submerged her face three or four times until the water was lapping around her forehead and jawline.

Tabor, 27, who had won custody of his daughter only four weeks earlier, admitted choosing the punishment because the girl was terrified of water.

Tabor, a soldier at the Lewis-McChord base in Tacoma, Washington, was arrested after being seen walking around his neighbourhood wearing a Kevlar military helmet and threatening to break windows.

18 Swords Swallowed

In Australia: Sword-swallowing cowboy busts record.

An Australian street performer has set a new Guinness World Record by swallowing 18 swords at the same time.

Chayne Hultgren, aka The Space Cowboy, swallowed the blades, each of which was 72 centimetres long, in Sydney this morning.

The 31-year-old from Byron Bay said he was thrilled to have made history. "It's amazing," he said. "I've been preparing for this since I was 16."

His secret?

"I don't just straight away grab 18 blades and shove them down my throat - you've got to practise a lot and build up to it.

"So I stretch my throat with hoses and use a few different techniques to basically enable me to do what, until now, has been impossible."

Pray For Mel

At American Catholic: Mel Gibson Needs Our Prayers.

Here is a man in his 50's, so personally familiar with the redemptive suffering of our Lord, a man married for many years with SEVEN children by this woman- and he has an affair with a young woman, and announces her pregnancy on - Jay Leno?? His wife divorces him and he is now apparently living with his new lover and his 8th child. And the next big step in his life will apparently be announced through the late night comedy format once more.

I agree. If you're going to waste your time praying for something, waste it on praying for a celebrity.